What are you?

EXTREME OWNERSHIP

Which is the easiest thing that we do when we fail in achieving something?

Blame...Excuses…

When things don’t go as per our plan, we show fingers at others or find reasons for its failure. Unlike taking the blame on self. Jocko highlights the importance of taking ownership of everything where you are involved. Whether personal or professional, extreme ownership is what is missing in the mission.

This is where the author Mr. Jocko emphasizes on the fact “there are no bad teams, only bad leaders”, the leaders who don’t believe in their teams. Leaders who refrain from taking extreme ownership eventually failing to achieve their mission in disparity. It’s not what you preach but what you tolerate. Having faith in the people who work with you is very important. Only when you know the WHY of the mission will you motivate others to do it.

These are a few principles towards winning the war within.

The author also encourages individuals to believe in teamwork. When working collaboratively with other teams, ensure you show empathy towards them and understand the other team’s problems as well. Working together towards common goals will get things done faster. 

Instructions are well communicated when the message is simple and clear. Simplicity is another key principle. The author believe that everyone should priorities their task first and then execute it. How are you going to finish too many things served in your plate otherwise? He also encourages the organizations to have proper org chart. Managing a huge team is no easy task. But by creating layers of management will help everyone achieve their mission.

Jocko motivates the readers to follow these Laws of combat.

Planning is an important aspect of any mission which should be shared across all levels and crosschecked for the progress. Transparency is what an organization should practice. 

Decision making could be tough at times. That is when one should be prepared to experience uncertainty. The most important never combine professional and personal life when it comes to business.

These are the principles which will help you sustain victory.

Marriage a Boon or a Menace?

The moment was so palpable for me, when after unwrapping the gift I found a book by Sudha Murty. She has been one of my favorite in the authors list, because she possesses magnificent writing skill to engage her readers, leaving a profound effect.

"House of Cards" by Sudha Murty is a story which well illustrates the significance of relations in today's jet-set life, where the ultimate goal of humans is to earn lots of money, even students today are bothered getting more marks with minimal study. Time has come that we realize the poem by William Henry Davies  "What is this life if full of care, we have no time to stand and stare". She succeeded in explaining the abacus of Life, which is not just making MONEY but to realize the importance of relations and get an empathy what are the requirements of our loved ones.

This is a story about a simple but vivacious girl named Mridula from Aladahalli village, Karnataka. Despite her intelligence and sharp mind, her umpteen interest was to become a teacher. Pursuing her ambition, she met Sanjay again, a doctor from Mumbai, who handed her a marriage proposal letter when she was leaving to her hometown.

Sudha well narrates Sanjay's childish thought, who believed that if the girl was equally interested then she would give an excuse that she would talk to her father, but if answer was 'no', then she would have tied him a Rakhi or declared him as her brother, worst than that she might even have lambasted upon him.

The story gears with the introduction of Sanjay's mother Ratnamma, a moneylender, who takes an opportunity to warn her daughter-in-law, Mridula, not to waste money, who had offered 10 bucks and beetle leaves to married ladies in the temple in lieu of blessing. Ratnamma justified that "Blessings are not proportional to money". It always baffled Mridula, whether or not to buy gift for her, because Ratnamma never appreciated the gift, rather she admonished saying not to waste money on such frivolous things. Ratnamma was completely different emoticon when compared with her daughter Lakshmi who was a spendthrift and cherished making inevitable show off.

Turning point comes when Sanjay opts to quit his government job and start of his own. Mridula had always supported Sanjay's decision, rather helped him financially too. His success reaches target range and becomes the owner of the famous nursing home 'Samadhan' in Bangalore. During his mid journey he reminisces his childhood, when his father preached him to find GOD in every patient, but his corrupted mind always found GODDESS LAKSHMI in every patient he attended. He converted every thought of his into money making schemes. Though he had become rich from rags, he did not value his people who had supported him in all his odd times. Once was a time when he was in love with Mridula, a charismatic school teacher, but now with the  accelerated success, he is compelled to wish if his wife were a Doctor.

His every act was now illustration of Newton's Third Law: "Action and reaction are equal and opposite". People who had once deceived him or taken advantage of him, were now worshipping him. But with this adoring fame generated immense arrogance in Sanjay, he treated the people according to their value in his professional career. He had become so shrewd that he even forgot that whatever he was today, was just because of his caring wife Mridula. Further the story discusses about the most debatable question "What does a woman want from a man?", also it categorizes men into three types.

To the world "The grass always looks greener in other people's lives", while the person undergoing that phase can only feel it. Saturation point comes for Mridula, when she decides to take a step after 25 yrs of their marriage.

We are left with a question if we should bear the grief without complaining? Is it fair enough to lead such a depressed life? Should we move on when we realize that the relationship is just for namesake? It is meaningless when the foundation of trust is perished in an intricate relationship like marriage.

Relationships are about not only taking, but also giving. If you find yourself not giving very much, or feeling resentful of how much you give and how little you receive back, you may be in an unequal relationship. Also money is good only till you control it and not when you are under its control. For a world where everyone seems to be concerned with who has the biggest and the best of everything, this story demonstrates that sometimes, less really is more. 

I would recommend this book to every individual who is married and will get married someday because Mignon McLaughlin very well said "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."